In a previous blog, I’ve described how NeuroCoaching helped me overcome a major setback when I became a target of a powerful bully at work.
Thanks to NeuroCoaching strategies, I was able to gather the strength and energy needed to deal with the bully at work. I needed to focus on doing a good job, building alliances and looking for a new opportunity at the same time.
It took a long time for the situation to develop. It took me a long time to realise that it was bullying. It took a long time to give up on the comfort zone that was no longer comfortable. It took a long time to decide to leave a workplace I loved for almost 10 years. But I also realised 10 years is too long and I was becoming a “dinosaur”!
It took a lot of energy to keep positive in a situation where someone is trying to put you down every single day. Where you know that she’s spreading rumours and you can tell from colleagues’ changed behaviour. Where you get demoted to lower and lower assignments. Where everything seems against you. You start having doubts about your own capabilities.
I tried to stay. I tried to resolve the situation by talking to the bully. I tried to gather evidence of her behaviour. She was too powerful and inspired fear in others. Nobody wanted to talk against her and preferred to lie. The situation seemed surreal.
In the beginning, leaving felt like a failure. But I needed to preserve my health. That was my priority. And moving on to new challenges was now due anyway. Deciding to leave took me a long time. But I was lucky enough to find another job quite quickly. In a much better company where people appreciate what I do.
But the trauma of the bullying didn’t end there. I needed more NeuroCoaching to deal with this trauma. Also to start feeling better about the working environment in general. Bullying can leave deep wounds of self-doubt, self-criticism and self-blame. It took me a long time to understand that the bully is to blame, not you!
I found NeuroCoaching provided me with a set of tools for dealing with traumatic memories by disrupting the traumatic memory reconsolidation in a deeply relaxed state of mindful awareness. If you’d like to book a complimentary 15-minute discovery session, please pick a slot at https://calendly.com/jitkaneurocoaching/15min.
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